Senior Living Advice: Getting Extra Help for a Loved One

By Beth Dow, Solutions by Beth

One of the hardest decisions we can find ourselves having to make is pulling the trigger and getting extra help for a loved one.

We tend to drag our feet on this decision for two reasons.  The first is our hesitancy to admit that we can’t do it or that we shouldn’t do it.  After all, if the extra help is for a parent, it is easy to get on a self-inflicted guilt trip and convince ourselves that we need to figure out how to help them because of “all they have done for us”.

The second reason we delay getting help is because the person that needs the help, tells us that they don’t need help.  In both cases, this way of thinking just delays a decision that is not going to get any easier.  If anything, it could cause the decision to be hurriedly made during a crisis, instead of being well thought out and planned.

If you believe your loved one may need extra help, but you aren’t sure if it is time to get help from an outside source, ask yourself the following:

• Is it getting harder and harder for you to get everything that you need to get done?

• Are you having to take time off work to help your loved one?

• Do you find yourself dreading or even resenting having to go and help a loved one?

• Is the relationship with your loved one being damaged by you being the caregiver?

• Has your physical or mental health been affected by the extra help you are giving your loved one?

If you answer yes to any of these questions, it is time for you to begin exploring how to find help.

You can begin small, like having groceries and personal items delivered instead of spending your time shopping and picking them up.  You can use the food delivery services to deliver meals from restaurants to your loved one.  Instead of taking your loved one to the doctor, sign up with a concierge doctor that will come to them.  (They do accept Medicare.)

And even though it may be hard for you to do, ask extended family members and friends for help.  Most likely if you tell them exactly what you need, they will be more than happy to help.    

When more help is needed, or if your loved one wants to be actively involved in their day-to-day activities, home care companies provide transportation, meal preparation assistance, shopping, and housekeeping, in addition to personal care such as bathing.  Home Helpers Home Care is the leading Home Care Agency in Coweta County and can be reached at 678-876-5118.

  If you need more information on how to know what the best plan for care of your loved one is, you can contact Beth at Solutionsbybeth.com.