Notes from Jackson Street: We all need a Facebook Quarantine

172
0
Share:

By John A. Winters, Publisher

Let’s say I posted the following on Facebook: “Remember what Abraham Lincoln said, don’t believe everything you read on the Internet.”

Here is what will happen. Half the Internet will go: “LIAR!! It was Thomas Jefferson. You’re the Antichrist. Your mother hates you and your children want to disown you. People like you are destroying America. Die, just die, you fool.

And so on and so forth.

I don’t know about you, but after being on Facebook for a while, I feel I need to go take a shower. 

You can’t even post a photo of your cat without someone saying “why did you post that colored cat.” “Why does he have brown eyes, do you have a problem with blue eyes.” 

And so on and so forth. 

Case in point. A couple of days ago we posted one of our occasional  factoids graphs regarding something with COVID-19. We mentioned how ironic it was that the same day the Coweta County School System announced the restart of face-to-face school was the same day Coweta reported the highest number of new COVID-19 cases.

“I’m convinced these poor folks don’t know how to read graphs and data. It’s fine if you don’t, just maybe don’t post such wildly inaccurate information online.” That was pretty much the view of the “you’re a liar group.”

Full disclosure: yeah, we just made it up. Just like we do every day when we report these numbers. Someone finally caught us.

Honestly, I am seeing fewer and fewer facts on Facebook. I am seeing an awful lot of “my way or the highway” but said in much harsher tones.

Everything is now black and white. Left or right. We have lost the middle ground. We have lost the grey areas. We can’t even agree to disagree anymore. I hate to think of the friendships being lost. 

I think we all need a Facebook quarantine, although we will continue to post the daily COVID numbers because we know it is important.

So without Facebook to talk about, how about sandwiches?

True “more than the Lincoln quote” story:

So, the Little Black Dress, aka The Paper Girl, aka Corby Winters, broke her heel. Something that is medically, apparently, very rare. And she was wearing tennis shoes, another rare occurrence, and not heels. She was born in heels.

Anyway, she cannot put any weight on said heel and is in a cast. We, that being me and the two SONS of Thunder still at home, have the honor of waiting on her hand and foot. Sometimes it can get …

Me: I’m making a turkey sandwich. I call upstairs, being the awesome husband I am, and say, “would you like a turkey sandwich?”

LBD: Yes please, what are you putting on it?

Me: Just mayo and ground pepper, we are out of cranberry sauce.

LBD: I would like mustard instead.

Me: Okay.

LBD: And lettuce …

Me: Okay

LBD: And sliced purple onions.

Me: ….

LBD: And could you toast it?

Me: Are you freaking … mumble, mumble.

LBD: And could you put it on that stone mountain bread?

Me: Sigh.

(Halfway through making sandwich, she calls me on the phone)

LBD: Could I have some water?

Me: Sure.

LBD: With ice …

LBD: And lime …?

Me: Grumble, grumble.

(Take up sandwich along with some grapes. I did NOT peel the grapes. I also threw on a couple of slices of mozzarella because, well yes, I’m that guy.)

LBD: OH, this is wonderful, it’s way too much for me.

Me: Are you kidding me? You said you wanted a sandwich! 

LBD: Did you toast the bread?

Me: Of course. 

LBD: Are you sure? (as she starts to scratch the bread to make sure.)

Me: I am so out of here.

Now wasn’t that better than reading Facebook?

Stay safe, practice social distancing and wear a mask.

Leave a reply

Share: