The View From The Loft: A Presidential Campaign in the works?
By Jim Coleman, The View from the Loft
I AM RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT!
Everybody else is running, why shouldn’t I? I have no name recognition outside a small circle of friends but that doesn’t seem to make any difference. The last time I checked, I had only heard of four of the candidates who have declared so I’m sure my announcement will not rock the wire services or sway the tide of public opinion.
Just in case you are one of the few people in the Coweta/Fayette area who doesn’t recognize me in public or voraciously soak up every word I write, let me explain my motivation for this announcement. My publisher graciously gave me an unpaid sabbatical in the month of January which was greatly appreciated. The outpouring of public concern for my unexplained disappearance from this publication has been so overwhelming that I had to return with a big story or risk shrinking back into obscurity.
In college, I earned a degree in political science, so I guess I’ve always had this latent desire to be in public service. I have some causes I truly believe in and I have some ideas that I’m positive could be solutions to some of society’s most pressing issues. I would also like to live for a few years in a 16-bedroom, 35-bathroom, 55,000 sq.ft. house on 18 acres in the middle of a big city, walking distance to shopping and entertainment. Lest you think I’m vain and this is all about me, let me assure you that the butlers, chefs, yardmen, helipad and private jet mean absolutely nothing to me. I’m doing this for you!
Here are some of my qualifications. I have filed an income tax return every year since 1974 and if we should have a late spring ice storm and you run out of something to do, you are welcome to view my returns. I have never once hired undocumented workers to care for my child, cut my grass or clean my pool … knowingly! I have never had a DUI, committed a felony, inhaled a controlled substance or torn a tag off my mattress. My heart beats approximately 90 times per minute and if you hold a mirror under my nose you will see a completely fogged surface in less than three breaths. I challenge my opponents to disclose their deepest secrets as I have done.
Please continue to read this publication in the next few months. My platform will appear here soon as well as my address for contributions. You too can be a part of the movement.
Jim Coleman is twice retired as a financial advisor and flight attendant. A theatre geek, musician, arts administrator and preservationists, he lived a relatively obscure life until he crossed paths with Corby Winters. Jm choose Newnan as his new forever home five years ago and is dedicated to making our community the best it can be.